The cow bleeds and I benefit(ed)
I had a really intense dream this morning that I'm still trying to piece together. I was trying to express myself to a young teacher who'd given out an assignment. Something about writing a letter to yourself, and I thought it would be important to keep the letter handy, in order to draw from it when needed. There's way more to it, but I've lost the philosophical reasoning since waking up. But I will try to honor my dream by writing myself a letter:
Dear Katie,
I think it's pretty safe to say you had a good week. More than that, you had a great week. A fun week. A crazy, burn-the-candle-at-both-ends kind of week. Enough's enough. Time for a shifting of gears. Time for a detox.
Jae Steele invited you to do a liver cleanse that started one week ago. Do it. It's 2 weeks long and totally reasonable. No refined sugars, no coffee, no alcohol and no dairy. 2 weeks. You can do it girl. Challenge yourself to do the vegan thang like you've been postponing for years.
Alright, you want this letter to go deeper? Let's have the moment you've been putting off where you finally admit to yourself what's really going on, but speak in the first person because this is weird.
***
Many years ago, dad took us to a small petting-farm type of place in Ottawa. They had goats and chickens but cows too. I remember walking by the barn where a cow was just kind of hanging out behind the gate. I glanced at its utters and saw that they were bleeding. It had just been milked. I did a bit of a silent cry and was really grossed out but didn't let it affect me the way I really wanted it to. My love for cheese outweighed my love for the animal. That upsets me now. Cheese sure is yummy, but I'm denying the truth I feel about farming animals. I think the process can be cruel and its unnatural to consume another animal's milk.
The cow bleeds and I benefit? That's terrible. If I could go back to that moment, I would let it get to me like the way the first significant cow affected me. It turned me vegetarian, so this one should have turned me vegan. It makes me nervous to think I might give up cheese forever, but like I've learned over the course of my transformational diet, one day at a time. With reason.
***
It's happening. You can do this. You love yourself and animals too. No big deal. Cutting coffee out? Kind of a big deal, but it's for the greater benefit of your liver. Sometimes letting go of things you depend on is where the greater lesson is learned.
Sincerely,
Katie.
Dear Katie,
I think it's pretty safe to say you had a good week. More than that, you had a great week. A fun week. A crazy, burn-the-candle-at-both-ends kind of week. Enough's enough. Time for a shifting of gears. Time for a detox.
Jae Steele invited you to do a liver cleanse that started one week ago. Do it. It's 2 weeks long and totally reasonable. No refined sugars, no coffee, no alcohol and no dairy. 2 weeks. You can do it girl. Challenge yourself to do the vegan thang like you've been postponing for years.
Alright, you want this letter to go deeper? Let's have the moment you've been putting off where you finally admit to yourself what's really going on, but speak in the first person because this is weird.
***
Many years ago, dad took us to a small petting-farm type of place in Ottawa. They had goats and chickens but cows too. I remember walking by the barn where a cow was just kind of hanging out behind the gate. I glanced at its utters and saw that they were bleeding. It had just been milked. I did a bit of a silent cry and was really grossed out but didn't let it affect me the way I really wanted it to. My love for cheese outweighed my love for the animal. That upsets me now. Cheese sure is yummy, but I'm denying the truth I feel about farming animals. I think the process can be cruel and its unnatural to consume another animal's milk.
The cow bleeds and I benefit? That's terrible. If I could go back to that moment, I would let it get to me like the way the first significant cow affected me. It turned me vegetarian, so this one should have turned me vegan. It makes me nervous to think I might give up cheese forever, but like I've learned over the course of my transformational diet, one day at a time. With reason.
***
It's happening. You can do this. You love yourself and animals too. No big deal. Cutting coffee out? Kind of a big deal, but it's for the greater benefit of your liver. Sometimes letting go of things you depend on is where the greater lesson is learned.
Sincerely,
Katie.
I feel like that Goat sometimes, and I'm not feeding another species!
ReplyDeleteKatie I was conflicted with this too, for so long and it seriously tormented me! ..or still torments me. I've been vegetarian for about 8 years with no problem but checking cheese off the list is soo hard! working on it :P
ReplyDeletenice Carly! I just want to be conscious you know? It is a struggle! The longest I went as a vegan was I think one week. So I have some work to do. And probably some research.
ReplyDelete