100 Days of Writing - 16

-
Dear Diary,

It's my "Sweet 16" and everybody bailed on my party last minute.  It's Friday night and I'm literally home alone in bed.  This sucks.  I keep waiting to get a Snap that actually makes me smile but so far it's been lazy "HBs" and heart emojis.

What did I do?  Seriously.  What did I do?  School was boring AF as usual today and when I got to my locker to go home there was just this one sad balloon tied to my lock.  I'm pretty sure Kristy took it from Cassandra B's locker, it had clearly been slowly deflating and her birthday was Monday.  FML.  

I get it- everybody's got their own shit happening but like... isn't today supposed to be about me?  I fucking baked a cake for Kristy's sweet 16 last month, the least she could do was like, post on my wall, tag me on Insta... SOMETHING.

I don't even think people are capable of caring anymore.  Not just about me but about life in general.  It's like there's all this dumb shit trying to grab your attention all the time that it numbs you to the point of a complete lack of care.  I can't even remember who the last person I made eye contact with was.  Probably mom, but she doesn't really count.  

Omg she got me a guitar for my birthday!  I was super stoked, hopefully I can get some lessons or something.  Or I'm sure I'll find some tutorials on YouTube. Def. 

I hate feeling like this.  I feel pathetic.  Like NOBODY cares.  I care.  I care!  Lame.  Whatever, I'll just throw myself a pity party with Marissa tomorrow.  She's actually at a friend's house tonight, not even staying home to hang with her sis on her Sour AF 16.  

#itsmylife

Trista.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The cow bleeds and I benefit(ed)

-
I had a really intense dream this morning that I'm still trying to piece together.  I was trying to express myself to a young teacher who'd given out an assignment.  Something about writing a letter to yourself, and I thought it would be important to keep the letter handy, in order to draw from it when needed.  There's way more to it, but I've lost the philosophical reasoning since waking up.  But I will try to honor my dream by writing myself a letter: Dear Katie, I think it's pretty safe to say you had a good week.  More than that, you had a great week.  A fun week.  A crazy, burn-the-candle-at-both-ends kind of week. Enough's enough.  Time for a shifting of gears.  Time for a detox. Jae Steele invited you to do a liver cleanse that started one week ago.  Do it.  It's 2 weeks long and totally reasonable.  No refined sugars, no coffee, no alcohol and no dairy.  2 weeks.  You can do it girl.  Challenge yourself to do the vegan thang like you've bee
Read more

relationsh*ts

-
I wonder if people, as adults, still ignore the people they have crushes on, just like in grade 5.  My first boyfriend and I, let's call him Matt, didn't even talk.   We decided to become boyfriend and girlfriend after his friend Robert asked me out for him.  I'm still not sure if we ever broke up.  We just didn't talk.  We had spent the weekend hanging out with neighborhood kids in Saint-Bruno, building a treehouse-fort in what I remember to be a big empty piece of land, and that Monday Robert asked me out.  For Matt.  I'm sure that space is covered in duplexes and model homes by now.  But there was one tree in an open area that we worked on.  I remember collecting debris with Matt while my heart was fluttering like nuts. Any excuse to follow him.  My stomach was a squishee machine and I'd blush when he looked at me and I'd laugh at all his jokes.  I've always been a mess when I like someone.  Thank God my acting skills compensate for the most part.   I
Read more

Popcorn Farts

-
Seems like an awkward way to meet someone, doesn't it?  Over a fart. After the awesome show I went to last night, which I will tell you all about later, I went to an awesome party featuring bands, ponies, and a pie-eating contest.  Yes, I said ponies.  There were two of them. Anyway I was watching one of the bands play some rockabilly in the living room, when someone let it rip, something fierce. And there were enough people to blame it on, but I made eye contact with the guy standing next to me and I said, "Someone's just making popcorn."  He laughed and blamed me and then walked away.  Later I saw him outside and the blame continued. I honestly thought someone had made popcorn, but the culprit later admitted it to me when he let one go again.  How much popcorn does one man have to eat to make it stink like that?! Drew and I hit it off but I guess he could never get past the thought that my farts could smell so bad, I later saw him hitting on another lady, wh
Read more